#dick grayson

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Wonder Woman: -oh, and thank you to Red Robin for that piece of insight you gave us last week, it was very helpful.

Damian dressed up as Tim, has no idea what she's talking about: ....no worries.

Aquaman: oh i wasn't here last week, what did you say?

Red Robin:

Red Robin: ....if you... sprinkle cinnamon on your window-ledges, then spiders aren't as likely to come into your house...?

Aquaman:

Wonder Woman:

Woman Woman: i was referring to the fact that you checked our suspect list and absolved Leonard Woodgate from suspicion due to his documented presence in Gotham during the incident.

Red Robin:

Red Robin: ah.

Wonder Woman, glaring at him: Damian.

Red Robin: fuck.

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*Nightwing, on his phone at the meeting table*

Green Lantern: hey, Dick, can you pass me my coffee?

Nightwing: *doesn't glance over*

Green Lantern: Dick.

Green Lantern: Diiiick?

Green Lantern: RICHARD? DICK???

Batman walking in: you called me?

Green Lantern, looking between them: w- oh for fucks sake- WHERE'S BRUCE?

Dick as Batman, shrugging: honestly i didn't even ask- hey, Tim, where's B?

Nightwing: *still doesn't look up*

Red Hood, showing up in the doorway: did you say my name?

Dick as Batman, now also slightly confused: ...oh is Jason me today?

Jason as Nightwing, finally looking up: oh- sorry, what? completely zoned out there.

Tim as Red Hood: yeah man, i'm Jason, Jason's you, and you're B while he's at the dentist.

Dick: ...huh.

Green Lantern: IF YOU CAN'T TELL HOW THE FUCK ARE WE SUPPOSED TO?!

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Robin, walking into the room: i'm here, are we starting the meeting soon?

*The rest of the league not giving him a second look*

Superman: ah, hello Damian. yes, sit down, we're starting soon.

Robin:

Robin:

Tim as Robin, angrily: oh fuck off- I AM NOT SHORT ENOUGH TO PASS AS DAMIAN.

The JL:

Damian as Red Robin, walking into the room and muttering under his breath: told you, you loser.

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bonus:

*Red Hood, pouring himself a coffee in the Watchtower kitchen*

Arsenal, coming up behind him and pinching Hood's ass: hey sexy, you coming to mine after this thing or am i coming to yours? we went to mine last time, but i dunno the weather in Gotham this week, so your choice.

Red Hood:

Red Hood:

Arsenal: what?

Dick as Red Hood: this cannot fucking be how i find out you're fucking my little brother, Roy.

Arsenal:

Arsenal: are you fucking- STOP DOING THIS.

Jason as Batman, walking into the room and looking at them for a second:

Jason as Batman: please tell me-

Dick: you treat my fucking brother with respect, Harper.

Jason as Batman: *loses his shit*

Duke: Why are you slowing down? It’s straight on.

Jason: I’m trying to figure out if this is the turn or if these co-ordinates are off.

Duke: It’s literally down there. Look, big sign. Can your Crime Alley ass not read?

Jason: At least we can read the street signs.

Duke: You don’t have street signs. You have arrows spray‑painted on trash cans.

Jason: Better than the Narrows. You get lost and you fucking pray Killer Croc jumps up from the sewers and fucking eats you just so you don't have to spend another second on those streets.

Duke: At least we have streets. Crime Alley is just a string potholes holding hands and one burning trashcan.

Bruce, over comms: Signal, Red Hood, table your conversation or you can get your asses back to the Cave.

Steph, over comms: Get a load of this Crest Hill bitch.

Jason: Stand your HOA ass stand down, Spoiler. Widow Creek isn't that great.

Steph: At least we have running water and flushing toilet, Park Row bitch. And before you even start Drake, your Bristol ass is on thin ice.

SOON-TO-BE-FWB!DICK GRAYSON, who never would’ve touched the idea of a casual, no-strings relationship with a ten foot pole. He didn’t want to use someone, it felt inherently wrong. To only expect sex and nothing else on top of it, it didn’t sit right with him.

But when you, his coworker and long time mission partner, pushed him against a side table and knocked over his key dish in the pursuit of your lips on his and his clothes on the ground, he found himself melting into it. Reaching out and gripping the back of your neck and moaning as your lips dragged over his Adam’s apple.

“I normally get wined and dined first—” he joked breathlessly before his subsequent whine was swallowed be your eager lips to shut him up. Your hands tugged off his v-neck (cashmere, by the way) and let it frump to the floor in an undignified pile.

Oh, fuck it.

Your panties bunched at your ankles as he fucked into you, palm flat on the wall and his moans echoing into your neck, pressing sloppy kisses to the hollow. “Yeah, fuuuuck, baby, just like that,” He panted, his button up hanging open. Maybe he was more into this idea than once thought.

Your knees were at his hips, the side table rattling with every upward stroke of his cock that kissed your cervix beautifully. Holy shit, you literally had no words.

“You gonna come, honey?” Hypocritical when he was five seconds away from coming, but he couldn’t help it plus the inherent need to know he wasn’t going to embarrass himself. But the way your pussy walls were fluttering around his dick, you were too. Thank heavens.

He cupped your jaw and consumed your soul through your lips, burying himself in you to the hilt one last time, a deep moan from his mouth shocking one out from you too as you too came five seconds after him. Not really kissing anymore, just his nose smushed awkwardly on yours so you could see the pretty flush on his cheeks and his eyelashes fluttering on his cheeks, panting as if he’d run a marathon.

“Shitfuck.” He breathed, the most he’d cursed within ten seconds, wiping a bead of sweat off your temple before kissing it. A little too romantic for your tastes, but you allowed it. “Oh, that’s not right.” He muttered, his stupidly hot blue eyes flicking over your naked body.

Was he gonna say this should never happen again? “What’s not right?”

He leaned forward, running the tip of his nose over yours so you jugular. His floppy hair tickled your jaw. “I didn’t,” He kissed a random spot softly, “eat you out first.”

“Did you want to?” You blinked.

“To be honest, I didn’t see this situation coming,” You both laughed breathlessly, but then his finger ran over your slit lazily, collecting your juices with a quiet shlick. Your thighs trembled.

“Shiiiit—”

“But after you came on my cock like that,” He began to genuflect, “I wanna feel it on my tongue.”

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